Prov. 4:23 (NIV) Above all else, guard your heart, for everything you do flows from it. (KJV) Keep thy heart with all diligence; for out of it are the issues of life. (NLT) Guard your heart above all else, for it determines the course of your life.
What does this really mean? Are we supposed to deny our feelings and never allow ourselves to experience the feelings of love and the emotions of attraction?
How do we guard our hearts and experiment with love and commitment? I’m pretty sure this is telling us to use wisdom in allowing our hearts to be given in commitment to another. Don’t get serious too fast. Wait until someone has proven themselves faithful and trustworthy before you allow them to have your heart. Because your “heart” determines the “course of your life.” If you allow your heart to broken and bruised and taken advantage of, it will poison your future with doubts, hurt and betrayal. You will find it difficult to give yourself completely to the “right “relationship.
Here are a few Biblical Principles for dating:
- Guard your heart– The Bible tells us to be very careful about giving our heart to another, because our heart influences everything else in our life. Prov. 4:23
- Pray about it– Ask God if he/she is right or not. God will speak to you, if you will take the time to ask Him and take the time to listen. Philippians 4:6 Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God.
- Know yourself first– Know your priorities, boundaries and principles. Don’t let someone else fashion, mold, or pressure you into someone that you are not. Make sure that you gauge quickly whether or not this relationship is moving you closer to God or further away from God. 2 Timothy 2:15 (NLT) Work hard so you can present yourself to God and receive his approval.
- Choose good friends– You are known by the company you keep.
1 Corinthians 15:33 We also tend to become like the company we keep. Do not be misled: Bad company corrupts good character. - Dress to attract a godly person– Trash attracts trash. Class attracts class. You don’t want to be lusted after. You want to be sought after. You want to be respected. So respect yourself first.
- Allow God to tell establish your self-worth– He speaks to our Spirit through peace, through nature, (sunsets, a warm breeze, a beautiful flower) through others and through His Word. Don’t rely on anyone to establish your self-worth. You are a child of God.
- Expect to be treated like a child of God– Expect that your values, boundaries, expectations are respected. If they are not respected in the dating period, they will never be respected at all.
- No “Missionary Dating”– You are either being untruthful to your date or untruthful to your values when you date to convert. It is God’s responsibility to transform people’s lives, not ours. 2 Corinthians 6:14 Do not be yoked together with unbelievers. For what do righteousness and wickedness have in common? Or what fellowship can light have with darkness?
- Date with the future in mind. Psalm 37:23 “The LORD directs the steps of the godly. He delights in every detail of their lives.” There are only two outcomes for dating relationships: getting married or breaking up. The key is knowing how to handle a relationship so that each person is honored in either outcome.
- Do not have sex until you are married.1 Corinthians 6:9-11 Don’t you realize that those who do wrong will not inherit the Kingdom of God? Don’t fool yourselves. Those who indulge in sexual sin, or who worship idols, or commit adultery, or are male prostitutes, or practice homosexuality, 10 or are thieves, or greedy people, or drunkards, or are abusive, or cheat people—none of these will inherit the Kingdom of God. 11 Some of you were once like that. But you were cleansed; you were made holy; you were made right with God by calling on the name of the Lord Jesus Christ and by the Spirit of our God.
- Is it really love?
1 Corinthians 13:4-7 defines real love. Ask yourself these questions:
- Are you patient with each other?
- Are you kind to each other?
- Are you envious of each other?
- Do you ever boast to or about each other?
- Is your relationship characterized by humility?
- Are you ever rude to each other?
- Are you self-seeking?
- Are you easily angered with each other?
- Do you keep no record of wrongs?
- Are you truthful with each other?
- Do you protect each other?
It’s impossible to be perfect in all of these areas, all of the time. But do you see a consistent, glaring issue that could cause a problem for a future foundation in your relationship?
I pray that God will guide you into a loving, supportive, strong Biblical relationship that will satisfy your every need.
Stay Free,
Kendall
awesome! How can I get a copy of this?